I remember the following vision from the sun dance I attended this year:

I’m sitting next to the sun dance fire. I suddenly feel myself raised up out of my body and am looking down at it. I am taken by “spirits” to witness my actual death last year from alcohol poisoning. I saw my family horrified, saddened and helpless. My body could no longer take the toxins. The spirits showed me this so as to inform me that not only had I died, but they were in fact responsible for moving me into another space/time location in which I could continue to live and be of benefit to the universal enlightened mind. They had performed an intervention–an abduction and subsequent reorganization of my molecular structure so that I would no longer find it desirable or possible to drink alcohol. I have not had any alcohol in over one year.

The spirits showed me this, and told me many things. They would only allow me to see that for which I was prepared. Purification was necessary. Sobriety, prayer, meditation, exercise, sweat lodges, community peace gatherings. I had to remain sober for a year before I could see and understand that I really had died the previous year. This was a profound teaching, and has completely changed the way I think and work in the world.

They took me to a circle. There were “men” sitting around a fire. It seemed to be foggy and near dusk. The men were all older than me. They asked me if I understood what they were showing me. I replied that I did understand, and I thanked them for their help. They asked me what vision I could share with them. I replied by pointing skyward, and there above us was a metallic vibrating saucer, shaking intensely and emitting a humming sound, modulating up and down in pitch. The sound seems still with me–it was high pitched, then lowered quickly, and stopped quickly, then repeated. The elder spirits asked me if I knew what this was. “It is my ancestor” I answered, and knew not only that the ancestors were still around, but they were maintaining equilibrium in the solar system through use of this vibrating saucer (many more such exist). The saucer was not strictly material in nature. Its colors were constantly changing, rainbow colors rolling across its surface like waves.

I was told to listen carefully, and remember the vibration of the craft. It was ringing almost like a meditation bowl, and I was told to use this energetic frequency to “sing” to the community and bring forth beauty and harmony through tuning my mind and body to this frequency. This was the path to work with sacred songs, sacred icaros.

Life, I was told, was created by It, or Them, the (or a) Force that unifies and is in relation to all things in the universe. The creator(s) was not in fact omniscient, though it would seem to be from the limited human perspective. A program was created/coded, and the history of the unfolding of the universe was contained within this program. What seemed to be history was this program. The unfolding was precarious. The creators were not sure it would last. They so loved the beauty of their creation that they programmed in that it would continue, propagate, and be free to evolve within a set of guidelines. This information has striking similarities to stories from the Book of Genesis and other world creation “myths”.

Returning to the craft and the circle of elders, I looked away from the saucer and they told me to lie down. I did so, and felt a light scan my body, penetrating every cell. They were clearing my body of toxins and poisons. They then told me to sit up. I looked at the fire. A council of spirits. I heard the following: “What do we do with him? He’s working well, straight, and is clear. Proceed with a clear heart and with a clear path. We are with you and love you. Remember us and honor us through your work.”

I bowed to the spirits and made a vow. I would work exclusively to bring peace and harmony to the world. This would start with the form of an online marketing business to help support my family. I would help channel the energy of the community to positive ends. I had their full support and I had the sense they were smiling, even laughing. Over and over “We love you, Be well, We love you, Be well”. I am in tears as I write this, and my heart is filled with joy and compassion.

I felt then as if I was falling, and found myself sitting again next to the sun dance fire. I stood, took some tobacco from a pouch, and offered in a prayer of thanksgiving to the fire, thanking it for its teachings. I offered cedar to the fire, with a prayer asking for further purification of myself, my mind and my body.

In the proceeding days, the spirits came in the form of community support in a way I can scarcely believe. I witnessed miracles in the form of instantly answered prayers. I feel tuned in to a force that is beyond my understanding.

In an earlier post, I mentioned that I had the sense of an imbalance in the relation between men and women at the sun dance grounds. Further reflection has forced a reevaluation of this impression. I saw that there is, in effect, a women’s warrior society alive and well through which the community of male energy is held in check, and through which community balance is created. This society is _extremely_ powerful, and operates as not only a sort of “advisory committee” making things happen, but as a guide to the community, working to restore harmony. I witnessed this society quickly and compassionately resolving community tensions. My understanding of the work of women to restore balance was deepened this year, and I give thanks for the opportunity to work with such a powerful group of healers.

I continue to meditate on my sun dance visions and will share more in the future. Aho all my relations!

Matthew Carlson is a philosopher, mystic, writer and entrepreneur living in Madison, Wisconsin. Read more of his work at Wisdom Lovers, and learn more about his entrepreneurial work at Madison Niche Marketing.